Tag Archives: family/life

2011 already!

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wow!! it’s already July and i’ve not posted anything for year 2011 as yet! last i checked it was still January.Β since i’m more relaxed today, which is sooo unusual, thought i’d take this time to quickly write some updates. (also because i was reminded by Claire G when she talked about her new blog that mine’s growing molds now :P)

my status was changed from SAHM to WAHM (Working At Home Mom) after CNY thanks to a good buddy who was willing to hire me to work online at home as a Customer Service for the company she’s managing. i started right after the hols, and so far, the pay has brought about a whole lot of difference to our monthly budget – in all things, He knows and He provides.

work is easy peasy, just a matter of time – what with housework, cooking and baby-sitting. the last one taking the most of my time. so when the kids nap in the afternoon, that’s my official worktime. and ever since Arielle started going to pre-school (8am – 12pm), i’ve had more quality time with Ashton during the morning hours, and sometimes read a chapter of a book before he gets up. THIS is luxury!!

Ayl has left the Sony family and joined Digi (communications company) in mid-May. he’s had to travel to Shah Alam everyday which makes 2hours of travelling to and fro every working day. sometimes, he gets home only at 8pm and that meant, more time for me with the kids… wwweeeee…. [note the sarcasm].

will write more when i’ve got more interesting things to post other than the boring everyday housewife blabber; though i do wonder if there ever will be anything more exciting than watching Ashton drool *sighs* πŸ™‚ till then…

 

 

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what is SAHM?

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SAHM – Stay At Home Mom

so i’m back and not working but staying home with the kids. people start asking me what i do at home with them… a simple question i cannot find an answer to. it’s been slightly more than a month already, what have i been doing with them at home?

how do i define the exact job description of a Stay Home Mom??

i ‘officially’ get up from the bed at 8am or 8.30am; ‘officially’ because i was never even fully knocked-out asleep anyway since my no.2 was born (he’s 9months now) but still rouses once or twice in the night. my guess is he’s just checking on us, i don’t know. in addition to that, since my no.1 still shares our room but on her own bed, she gets up sometime at night to use her potty. i know i don’t have to supervise her anymore, but i’m just up just in case.

and then there are the miserable nights when no.1 gets bitten by mozzies and couldn’t stop-whining-and-go-to-bed where i get only 45% of sleep at night because if she doesn’t stop, no.2 will get up as well and THEN, there will be no sleep at all for everyone! that’s life living in the tropical country!

i also get up most nights to switch off the air-con and then open the window for ventilation; to which the Muslim morning prayers will wake me near 6am because we stay so near the mosque. by 7am, Ayl’s alarm would set off but i’d make sure he gets up on time for his bath and work.

babysitting ain’t easy when i also have housework to do. there are laundry and diapers to be washed, dried, folded and kept; there’s the floor to be kept clean for no.2 to crawl on; there is mealtime which means i’ll need to find the time to prepare food before they get hungry and cranky; there is bathtime and naptime and playtime – all these with a lot of attention and focus needed. since no.2 is only 9months, he needs more naptime and often when he’s tired and i’m too busy, he’d get really cranky – and then i’ll go crazy. πŸ™‚ it’s difficult to juggle a curious and active 2+y.o. child with a baby especially when it comes to naptimes; when one wants to sleep and the other one doesn’t. but i thank God that my lil one is a good girl, she’d keep really quiet when i tell her to so that her younger brother gets to sleep. because then, mommy gets to play with her!

EVERYDAY IS UNPREDICTABLE! when things go smooth (no one goes cranky and everyone is ‘tame’), it’s good. but when things go bad, it can get really bad – like losing my sanity!! so what’s the trick to keeping the peace?

1. ensure all their needs are met and satisfied before doing other insignificant things ie laundry, or if you can hold it from going to the toilet or… checking your FB!

2. if you need to prepare food but can’t find the time to – wake up before the kids do or prepare them the day before or whenever you have free time.

3. forget about ME-time; until they’re asleep or when your spouse is back home to take over… for a while. this include your bath/toilet time πŸ˜› well, you know what they say, Love is Sacrifice!

so, this is my day everyday. when i get some ME-time, i try baking (very new at this) and i update my blog!

Settling Down Once Again

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wow… i’ve stopped writing for more than a month! how time really flies when there is so much to do. we’re setting up our house little by little, we have most of what we need, the basic necessities like the bed, wardrobe, dining table and chairs, kitchen cabinet except for curtains and a sofa set. i think we’ve gotten so used to living without curtains in Brats (well, we have them in Brats but they were the see-through type) that it’s not in our priority list; but it shall come soon.

after we touched down, we stayed over at Bro Ray’s for a few days and borrowed a car from Bro Fred so we could go around (very grateful to them for their generosity and hospitality). Sis D prepared our lunches and dinners the few days we were there. the kids had a tough time settling down what with the jetlag, different environment and especially the change of weather. Ashton cried and cried nearly every night and didn’t want anyone else but me; not even his ‘Slumberland’ daddy. and because Ashton was crying so loudly, Arielle couldn’t fall asleep. so we’d end up sleeping at 5am and waking up at 12pm for almost a week!

we decided that it wasn’t so nice to have the kids continue wreaking so much havoc in our host’s house (their kids need to go to school) so, we went to purchase a mattress (Vono – comfy!) and quickly moved into our then empty apartment as soon as possible. John’s sister gave us a single mattress and also a small infant mattress, so that helped a bit with our sleeping condition. few days later, we went to purchase things like the water heater, aircon!! and my gas cooker with oven :). woohoo! i get to bake and grill here too!

we got more stuff from Ikea since they were having a SALE and (i don’t know how to phrase this better but…) we got a culture shock! LOL!! either we forgot or we’ve gotten used to shopping at Ikea Bratislava, we just couldn’t understand why there is so many people at Ikea KL – it took us nearly an hour looking for a space just to park our car! what the heck is going on! and inside the showrooms and market place itself, it was so packed that one can’t even walk, you’ll need to tag slowly behind the massive sea of people with trolleys and prams and crying children and oh! just trying to describe it now makes me breathless and lightheaded again. and all we wanted to do was to get what we wanted and get out of there, but then the line at the checkout counters were long as well. really really? does everyone go there to shop for something or just for fun’s sake – coz it was no fun at all for us. no way are we going back there again unless it’s really worth the trip.

currently we’re still waiting for 70% of our stuff from the sea cargo; it’s ETA is mid Aug. by then we’ll have another headache of unpacking and looking for space to keep our things in proper. hopefully everything will fit into this smaller unit. meantime, the kids have adjusted themselves and we’ve somewhat resumed a daily routine; the next big purchase will be for a suitable car because currently we’re using my little white kancil 660cc. nothing wrong with that since my father kept it in really good condition, it’s just a bit constrained due to 2 babyseats behind, and a ‘Slumberland’ daddy-o in front. πŸ™‚

oh and i nearly forgot to mention; the kitchen cabinet we got from the hired contractor was fabulously done with a good price. (thanks Goons!) the materials used aren’t el-cheapo and the workers who came fixed up everything nicely and NEATLY (swept and wiped everything after). needless to say, we were happy with the end product as well as the service. if you’re interested, drop me a line.

Destination: Homeland – Malaysia

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the time has come but all too soon for us; we’re finally going back to Malaysia for good this Sunday. it’s been nearly 2 years (come August) and just when we thought we’ll be here for another 1 more year (we’ve prepared our hearts for it), God has other plans for us.

it’s so disheartening when we first got the confirmation; one of the main reason for me was because i just got back here in Brats with the kids in March and we just got to know better the lovely and wonderful people from Citylights! we spent our first year here being so lonely (we only have 1 close family friend – the Dale’s) and ‘unhappening’ and then suddenly we joined this new church and we found a Family. Just when it seems like everything is going well, we’re being sent back. sighs~

even so, we trust that God has great plans for us back in Kajang. on the other hand, Ayl and i are both looking forward to building our own home (finally!!), a place we can call our own. we’ve been renting and staying at other ppl’s houses since Uni…

so what have i gained from this blessed opportunity to live abroad:

1. Family > Work

– people here leave work sharp, few do OTs and when it’s a major public holiday like Easter or Christmas, everybody (and i really mean EVERYBODY) spend time off work. Malls/Shops/Restaurants are closed, much to the misery of ppl like me because oftentimes on holidays, i’d rather celebrate these occasions out of the house i.e. the beach (there is no beach here), the mall, the eateries… you get my drift. well, you Brat friends can argue that there are the many beautiful parks or the Slavin memorial πŸ˜› but we can’t go there at night with kids right? come to think of it, the honest truth is we just don’t want to be home alone; it’d be nice to get invited to join in with a family. so for those of you looking for triple pay income during the holidays, there’s no such thing here.

– women who has just given birth are given 3years maternity leave, after 3years the company will take you back. (wonder what happens if you have one baby after another??) meanwhile, the state will provide a certain financial amount to the family. here, it is an unwritten rule for women to stay at home with their babies till they are 3years old; leaving the babies for work earlier will be deemed as ‘a bad mother’. imagine that!

after nearly 2 years here, we’ve caught on this priority; Ayl and i agree that we should put family first before work. now that we’re heading back, i would like to stay home to take care of the kids rather than going out to work until they start going to pre-school. however, this of course will depend very much on Ayl’s income, if it should be sufficient for us.

2. Cooking with the Oven

– yeaaa… sad but true. i only got to know how to use the oven when we got here. i didn’t grow up with an oven at home and never got to know how to use it; that’s coz Β (i think it’s safe to say) 80% of the Malaysian households do not use the oven to cook or even own one. what we used to use was a small round plug-in electric oven whenever we wanted to make a marble cake or kuih bankek (a type of traditional cookie) during the Chinese New Year. so, after getting this chance to fully use a modern ‘full-fledge’ oven, i think stir-frying comes second best. it’s convenient (don’t have to keep checking up on it or stir it), cleaner (no cooking oil splish splash everywhere) and some of the recipes are soooo easy and healthy.

[can’t believe this has been sitting here for 2+ weeks now, i better finish up]

3. Encounters with God & His people

– i remember just sitting by myself and tears will come; i was so depressed and lonely when we first came here, esp during the dark winter days when we would only get sunlight for 4hrs a day. God has been extremely good to me (and to us). i really can’t begin to tell each and every experience that i’ve personally had with him, there are just so many esp after we have joined Citylights. BLESS THE LORD O MY SOUL!! i have been strengthened in my faith πŸ™‚

– even when i was away from Aylwin in Kuching, He has strengthened our bond and has revived Ayl’s spirit. i feel that he has a new level in faith and that is extremely good for me and the family. God is awesome!!

i think i better end here and post this up before i’m caught up with the daily motion of things at home again and this post might end up not being posted at all… πŸ™‚ shall write more when i’ve the time and thought of something more.

Multilingual

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i find a lot of benefits being able to speak more than one language. i’m not talking about the obvious reasons like being able to communicate with a wider range of people from different nations… etc, etc.

since Arielle is learning to understand more and more of the language Ayl & i speak everyday, sometimes she picks up on what we talk about esp on things about her when i ‘report’ to him what has happened during the day.

so having to speak in another language that we don’t use often like (BM/Cantonese/Mandarin) helps us to communicate efficiently with each other and still keeping her in the dark!

muahahahaha!

Power Struggle

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don’t know what it is?

try dealing with a 2year old toddler everyday and you’ll know the exact meaning of it. don’t have to be in politics or business.

nearly everyday i have to struggle with Arielle on simple things like eating her food, toning down so she doesn’t wake her brother up, getting dressed, going to bed… but most of all, not to touch things she shouldn’t be touching.

she listens according to her mood or when chocolate is offered (this is a sureproof way) but most of the time; 7 out of 10, she just does whatever she wants whatever we say. things get worse when i’ve to attend to Ashton first.

just yesterday during nap time, she said she’s not sleepy (when she is!) and doesn’t want to nap – usually, i’ll convince her to sleep but yesterday i thought i’ll let her go her own way. so i told her, if you don’t want to nap, you mustn’t cry later and no tantrums.

O.K!

so with much difficulty, i put Ashton to bed because this lil missy was making so much noise; whining and playing with stuff. and then she started getting cranky and asking for this and that (not really wanting them), just being ‘funny’; touching things she knows she shouldn’t. so after much heedless warnings from me, she got some smacking. she cried very loudly and terribly as if it’s the worst thing ever and didn’t want to stop. needless to say Ashton got up, and because he didn’t get enough sleep, he cried as well.

OH!!! i was soooo mad – emotionally and psychologically!! these kind of days really test my patience and sanity. i felt as if i could slap her senseless.

and then i’m reminded about what LOVE is supposed to be in 1 Corinthhians 13:4-8, through a bookmark which i was using for a book i was reading. wonder why i didn’t really notice the contents before.

1 Corinthians 13:4-8

Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is no proud. It is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps not record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always preserves. Love never fails.’

oh Lord forgive me for being so quick to anger. i pray that i’ll always be reminded of this so that i’m able to be a good parent to these 2 small, innocent and beautiful children of mine.